Having ADHD we are prone to be creatures of habit, by necessity. We develop routines and standard practices to ensure success in our lives, both socially and professionally. It can take a while to develop a habit, and it can take a while to break a habit.
But Andrew, why would you want to break a habit?
Glad you ask.
I have developed a few habits to ensure social normalcy, such as conversation starters. I, for one, hate awkward silence. I will often start a conversation by asking about a friend or loved one. “How’s the Mrs.?” for example. But what if ‘The Mrs.’ is now ‘the Ex’? Then you just feel like an asshole. Sometimes I’m just so used to asking the question, that it comes out without thinking.
Its always been difficult for me to uphold social normalcy and out of strict fear of rejection I have developed these strong habits. However I have found that with recent changes, both good and bad, in my own life as well as the lives of several of my friends, my existing habits could get me into a bit of a pickle! I might ask about someone who has passed away, or refer to a friend’s current spouse by the name of an old spouse! These types of critical social mistakes happen to me ALL THE TIME. So you can imagine my apprehension when, in the last few months, so much has changed in my own life and that of others.
Relying so hard on our habits can make it difficult to be cognizant of change and to adapt to it. Maybe a healthy fear of change might just be enough to help me pay closer attention.